Courses/Computer Science/CPSC 203/CPSC 203 2007Fall L04/CPSC 203 2007Fall L04 TermProjects/Dr. Love.com

Group

Group Name:The No Shows

Group Members: Tanner Boothby, Laura Ingram, Caleb Giesbrecht, Mathew Venner, Brennan Pike

Initial Project Statement

How is match.com changing the way romantic relationships are formed and maintained? What are the broader social effects, and what does the future of dating hold? Is the virtual meat market safer than the local club?

Arugument

Online dating services are increasing the options that individuals now have to find their special someone, but is this really helping people? Are romantic relationships formed online different from romantic relationships formed in person between two people face to face?

In the following sections we will look at the differences between online dating and "old fashioned, face to face" dating, the dangers associated with each, and whether these differences are significant or not. Through our analysis we are expecting to find that although online dating may be changing the way dating is taking place and how people are meeting eachother romantically, it is really not that different from the old fashioned form of dating.

Introduction

Nerds from all edges of the earth now have a chance to score some points with the ladies thanks to a relatively new internet technology called online dating. Our group will mainly focus on match.com, one of the more popular dating websites. We will start with what Match.com actually is and how it works. Next, we will look at the social effects these types of websites have on our society. As well, we will taking you on an exciting journey of interesting facts, emotional idea, and possible dangers of internet dating. Match.com is a consumer oriented dating site that allows people from a wide range of ages to find love online right from their computer desks. We will examine whether this is an improvement from the bar scene or a less passionate, more lazy attempt at finding love.

History

Match.com is a publicly held,operating business of IAC/InterActiveCorp and was launched on the web April 21, 1995. It has pioneered the online dating industry and now has over 15 million members in 32 countries that span 6 continents. Match.com's international subscription grew 90% in 2004 alone. Match.com used to be wholy owned by subsidary Ticketmaster and part of USA networks before becoming part of InterActiveCorp. The first year that Match.com was operational about 60,000 people registered now over 60,000 people register everyday. Here is a bit of a timeline for this ever expanding website:

1995 - Match.com goes live as a free beta.

1996 - Match.com is instituted as one of the first online business models on the internet.

1998 - Match.com is purchased by Cendent, then purchased by InterActiveCorp.

2001 - Match.com goes through major sight design changes, particularily in sight search and quicksearch areas.

2002 - Match.com launches 25 international local language sites that support local languages and currencies.

2003 - launch Match.com advisors to assist people in writing their profiles.

2004 - Match.com forms partnership with Cingular Wireless to offer MatchMobile wireless dating service to Cingular's 24 million voice and data customers throughout the USA.

2005 - Match.com reaches the 15 million subscribers mark on 32 countries in 18 languages.

2006 - Match.com signs Dr. Phil to give dating advice at a modest charge of $12.99 per month.

Facts & Statistics

Match.com, among other personal sites have experienced unbelievable growth over the past few years. -In 2001 Match.com had a membership of 1.8 million people. In 2005, they reported a membership of over 15 million people in 32 countries, speaking 18 languages. -Presently, Match.com has a membership that consists of 55% men and 45% women. -The entire online dating industry produces more than $204 million in the US alone. -Up to 30% of single people have used an online dating website. -The average paying member of an online personal site spends an average of $239 per year on online dating. -Many men out there will be pleased to hear that in the US there are 86 unmarried men to every 100 unmarried women. -44% of adult North Americans are single. -Match.com is recognized by the Guinness Book Of World Records as the largest online dating site in the world. -Women who are members of online dating services receive an average of 5 emails per day. Men on average receive only 1 to 2 emails per day. -Men prefer pursuing women younger than themselves, where women prefer pursuing men older than themselves. -Some ballpark prices for memberships to various matchmaking websites are: Match.com $29.99/mo, Yahoo Personals $12.49-24.95/mo, eHarmony.com $20.95-59.95/mo, True.com $21.67-49.99/mo.

How It Works - Finding Your Match

Matchs are not so much found but looked for. After inserting the information about what your looking for in a relationship, Match.com gives you a list of people who match the critearia of your search. After this you are given the opportunity to interact with the people of your choice. Also by creating a profile people are able to view you in their searchs and communicate with you.

With free and unlimited searching you can look for matchs anytime you want. Match.com offers a six month guarantee that you will find someone special. There are also specific group searchs availible such as; Christian Dating, Jewish Dating, Asian Dating, Black Dating, Senior Dating, Gay Dating.

With over 15 million singles online internet dating seems to be a new rush in the relationship industry.

Custom searchs allow you to find the partner your looking for. With search options from hieght to turn-ons, matchs can be found easily and the perfect person can be sought out. Email is the new way to talk to people, communicating with other singles is done through your match.com inbox. This also allows you to choose who you wish to interact with if someone contacts you.

Searchs are saveable so the long process of finding that perfect match does not have to be repeated. Dating advice is also availiable from Dr. Phil to help you with what to say to that special someone.

Required Information

There is not very much information that is required to have your own Match.com account. You must give your; name, postal code, country, age, your gender and the gender you are interested in,and your email address. You then fill out a information sheet on your appearence so that others searchs can identify you. Certain information that you do not feel comfortable sharing can be skipped and allows any user to feel safe. Optional information lets you share as much or as little as you want. It takes very little time to set up your proflie.

Dangers and Safety Precautions

Putting your name, photos and other information about yourself on the Internet is never a safe thing to do. The thing about online dating is you never know who you are talking to. It is very simple to provide false information to any website, that it is impossible to know if the information you are reading about a person you are interested in is even correct. This false information can lead to meetings with dangerous people, disappointment and even heartache. Providing too much personal information can lead to stalkers, harassment, identity theft, or worse. Some safety precautions to think about when using match.com or any other online personal site are as follows.

1. Keep your personal information personal. Do not give out your last name, address or home phone number to people that you chat with on the internet.

2. When you feel ready to move from communicating by email to talking by phone, use a cell phone not your land line phone at home. Using a cell phone gives you the opportunity to get to know someone with out giving up your home address.

3. If you decide to meet in person, do not have your date pick you up at your house. Plan to meet in a public, well populated and well lit place. Always conceal your address until you are confident that your new friend is safe.

4. You should also consider taking a friend with you on your initial meeting or have them check in with you on your cell phone. Set up code words that will let them know that you are either OK or need help to get out of there. At the very least, let someone know where you are going and when you expect to return. Give them the name, phone number, address and description of your date.

5. Don't go to your date‘s home or invite them to your home until after several public meetings have taken place.

6. Drive separately. Always use a paid internet dating service. Free services often do not require a credit card or other verifiable information that would make it possible to identify a problem member.

7. Always remember to stay clear of married people, these sites are intended for singles.

Positive and Negative Effects

Online dating, albeit not a new trend, is one which is still controversial in the eyes of many people. There are millions of people who enjoy online dating, and thousands who join the online dating community daily, but regardless, to some, the negatives far out weight the positives.

Due to the vastness of the World Wide Web, one is easily able to meet and get to know an individual from the comfort of their own home. With the aid of such things as avatars, webcams, audio messaging and web conferencing one is able to overcome the detached nature of the internet and be left with a more humane and connected experience with an individual online.

Online dating also provides users with a safe haven from the insecurities they may feel when dating outside the virtual world. People ashamed of physical appearance and who have a low self esteem are able to interact in a social environment without limiting themselves because of their insecurities and because of this may be able to attain a relationship that was thought not possible through offline dating. For instance, in a recent article by ABC news, an online dating service called “The Positive Connection” was in the spotlight for helping “thousands of HIV-infected people find love through his website”. An example of the positive effects of online dating.

The main problem perceived with online dating is the anonymity that accompanies it. Many people who use online dating often have their own chosen identity which is false more times then not; an online user even has the power to change his/her gender. Most of the time users lie about physical characteristics and attributes and like in the world of offline dating, the negative effects of the deception is still felt by the other individual involved in the online relationship. Also, due to the lack of physical interaction, much is left unanswered and to question about whom you are really talking to. Because of this, one is often forced to fill in the blanks and a false reality or virtual identity is created for both parties involved in the online relationship which leads to disappointment when this false virtual identity is realized.

Emotional and Social Differences

One way to see if online dating is different from “face-to-face” dating is whether the individual’s involved act differently based on the fact that they are interacting in a virtual world and are not actually face-to-face.

According to an article written by Hara Marano titled "Cyberspace:Love Online", “online relationships can be unusually seductive. They are readily accessible, they move very quickly, and under the cloak of anonymity, they make it easy for people to reveal a great deal about themselves.” According to this statement, the fact that the individuals are interacting in this virtual world and are basically anonymous to whomever they are chatting with, they tend to lose their shyness and reveal a lot about themselves in a shorter period of time than they might have otherwise done if they were chatting over dinner in a normal date setting.

Marano goes on to say that this anonymity and self disclosure causes “attachments to form quite literally with the speed of light.” People are willing to reveal more about themselves which cause relationships to form very quickly. Under this sense of anonymity, individual's seem to lose their self conscienceness are able to form close relationships quickly causing tight bonds to attach.

Marano goes on to say that “Online affairs are, above all, safe. There's no danger of pregnancy or sexually transmitted disease." Individuals are able to form intimate relationships without having to worry about any physical threats to their bodies. Close social ties can be made without any physical contact or even knowing what the other person's voice sounds like.

A similar article titled "Love.com: The Virtual Dating Game", written by Jason Williams, stated that "for those who shun singles bars and the dating scene, meeting someone virtually can forgo much of the uncomfortable aspects of dating." According to this statement, dating online allows the reader to almost become a more confident version of themselves, losing the insecurities that they would normally have while dating in person. Perhaps this helps people open up more easily, and therefore causing these relationships to move more quickly.

Although there are some positive social aspects to online dating, are any of these aspects really all that different from in person dating? If an individual was ready for a relationship, would they become more attached more quickly just because the relationship was formed online rather than in person? Moreover, are these differences positive or negative? Are there any dangers to the increased openness that seems to be portrayed by anonymous online connections?

Significance Differences and Dangers

According to Marano, individuals find the anonimity of online relationships helps them to open up and reveal more about themselves in a shorter period of time. I would argue that if an individual was ready for a relationship, and had been having difficulty meeting anyone, when they finally met someone that interested them they would be more willing to move quickly and open up whether that was in person or online. I think that this aspect of a relationship would be based more on the social position of the individual rather than context.

However, if this is true, and some individuals do find it easier to reveal more about themselves when materialistic aspects of life are taken out of the equation, is this a safe situation to be in? Revealing personal feelings or information to another individual when you are not even sure who that individual is may not be a very good idea. This person that you just met could perhaps not be the person that they are portraying online. Therefore, these strong feelings that you are feeling could be for a virtual person that may not actually exist in the real world.

In the book titled "Love Online: Emotions on the Internet," written by Aaron Ben-Ze'ev states that the "imagination, which paints cyberspace in more intense and seductive colors, also helps people satisfy some of their most profound desires." He is trying to make the point that people seeking love or romance may meet someone, and instead of getting to know that person, may use their imaginations to make that person more attractive. Therefore, they may think that they are falling in love with someone, but really that person is just an individual that their imaginations have helped to create into an individual that contains all of the qualities that they are looking for.

Marano seconds this theory of imagination playing a large role in constructing the person that you want to meet. She states that individuals "rely heavily on imagination to fill in the blanks about the recipient." Statements with no facial expressions or acoustic meaning can be interpreted many different ways, and individuals may lean more to interpretations that meet their desires, therefore creating their own interpretations.

Conclusion

Finally, we have looked at what online dating actually is, how it works, and whether it really is changing the way romantic relationships are formed. But is it really changing the ways people act when in a romantic relationship, or the issues that come up in an average relationship? These are the real questions that we were trying to examine and find out.

Through our analysis it is quite clear that online dating, and specifically Match.com, is definately changing the way romantic relationships are originally formed. The idea of listing your name and interests, and then allowing many people access to this information in order to see if they would be compatible with you is allowing individuals to increase the number of individuals that could be possible mates. However, the dangers that come after this initial connection and the changes that an individual may show don't seem to be all that significant.

One specific danger listed for online love mates is whether the individual that they are connecting with is really who they think they are interacting with. The danger lies in whether the individual is telling the truth about themselves, who they are, what they look like, what they do, how much money they make. Although in person an individual cannot fabricate what they look like, men and woman dating are almost known for exagerating aspects about themselves. Online dating is basically the same thing except for the fact that the other individual doesn't have to actually look you in the face when fabriating the truth. Either way, you should never really fully trust a person until you have known them for a pretty long time, and that goes for face to face dating, and online dating.

The second main difference of online dating from face to face dating is that individuals seem to change, be more confident, and attach quickly to other people. As was discussed earlier, when an individual is really ready for a relationship, or even a little bit needy for a relationship, is forming that relationship online going to change the fact that they are willing to attach quickly? Also, interpretating certain things in a way that suits their needs and filling in the gaps with their imaginations is something that all men and women do early in a relationship, as long as they are a romantic in the first place. Therefore, the way an individual acts online, although they may be more confident when physical features are taken out of the equation, is not going to change when these two people meet in person.

Finally, is there any significant differences with online and in-person relationship forming? It seems clear that internet dating sites give individuals the chance to increase the number of people they meet and therefore increase their chances of forming a romantic relationship in the first place. It is basically a numbers game that gives people a larger demographic to choose from. But beyond that point, the dangers associated with dating are the same, and the precautions that should be taken are no different if that person was met in a local coffee shop.

Overall, it is a good thing that individuals have the option of meeting more people and possibly increasing their happiness by meeting a special someone. Match.com is giving single individuals the chance at a full life, but these people still come with all of the insecurities and features that they had in the first place.